In 2018, I found myself navigating a series of challenging relationships and circumstances, ones that left me feeling unwanted, rejected, and abandoned. It was a time of immense pain, but within this pain, a beautiful transformation began to unfold.
During this time, I began to explore tarot cards and meditation for direction, answers, and healing. Sensing divine intervention, it dawned on me that I needed to love and accept myself. Whether or not others loved or wanted me in their lives didn't matter so much because I could fulfill my own need for love and acceptance.
Then, in 2019, I took pen to paper and began to write a love letter to myself. Full text below. This wasn't an ordinary letter; it was a promise of unwavering love, a testament to my inherent worthiness. This letter served as a gentle reminder that even in the depths of loneliness, I was never truly alone. I am loved and cherished, not just by others, but by myself.
Through writing this letter to myself from myself, I uncovered a powerful truth: To truly love and accept others, and for them to love and accept us, we first need to love ourselves. While I knew that this was not a magic pill to heal everyone all at once, the ones who needed it most would receive it and begin healing and sharing.
With the understanding that this love letter was not for me alone, I decided to share it publicly. I created a video of me reading the love letter, which I shared via social media. Additionally, I created a public “I Love You” group on Facebook, inviting others to join with the request that they read the letter (as is or modified) on video and post it there.
I also conducted live readings, which became part of the 2019 “I Love You” Tour, always inviting others to hear the letter as if they were reading it to themselves from themselves, in the hope that my own path towards self-love and acceptance could inspire others and set our society up for much-needed healing. In the summer of 2019, I performed the love letter as my final Masters of Fine Arts thesis exhibition at Vermont College of Fine Arts. I have seen the readings and sharing of my love letter touch people deeply. I received lots of positive feedback from people who said they needed to hear my love letter and that it made them cry tears of healing.
During 2020, amid the COVID-19 Stay-at-Home order, I created numerous hand-drawn digital artworks featuring the words “I Love You.” I wasn’t able to go out publicly reading the letter until much later. Since everyone was advised to wear masks in public, I embroidered “I Love You” on mine in a variety of different styles. Many people were divided in debates over whether masks were effective or not and had begun to put snarky remarks on their masks. I felt that mine were a good message of positivity and peace. Sometimes, when out in public, people who were close enough to read my masks remarked, “I love you too.”
In 2021, joining forces with my then-partner, we embarked on a more than 4000-mile “I Love You” Tour for World Peace in my RV. We visited locations from Florida to Maine, to Iowa and back, with me reading the love letter and my partner performing comedic musical numbers for two months. During these performances, I invited anyone who wanted to receive a short three-card oracle reading to assist in writing their own love letters. The oracle readings were meant to be helpful for people who didn’t know where to start.
On January 22, 2022, I performed a reading of the love letter to a packed house at Venus St. Pete in St. Petersburg, Florida.
During the winter of 2023, I started creating t-shirts, mugs, and stickers with my “I Love You” artworks.
On April 22, 2023, I performed a reading of the love letter via Zoom during a retreat for Maine Artists Cohousing.
Ongoing, I continue to share the message of love and read my love letter to individuals and on social media via short videos. This is a timeless practice.
The Letter
Dear _______________________,
I know that you have been dealing with a lot lately. It’s been very hard for you to believe in yourself. It feels like you have been in the desert. But that is about to change. I am writing this letter to you now so that you may know that I love you. I have always loved you. My love for you is carrying you now, and has always been the force that propels you forward and upward. I am here with you forever. I am you and I Am Love.
Through your beauty you shine Love’s light onto others. The world’s standard of beauty does not apply, it is the love that you are that radiates true beauty. When others whom you've loved have turned their backs on you, I am there, I will never abandon you. When it seems like you have turned your back on yourself, I have been there to call you back. The world has not always seen your beauty and has often rejected you. You are a treasure and not to be cast aside or trampled.
When you were a little child, giggling and playing. I have kissed your cheeks and patted your head with the light of the sun. I have brushed against you as the wind. I have called your name with the songs of the birds and the trees rustling in the breeze. Love is all around you calling you to notice.
When you have felt like giving up, I am there to lift and hold you. When you have made what you thought were mistakes, my love reminds you that those were lessons learned and were the exact lessons you needed to grow into who you are today. Do not berate yourself when you have had to take your affection away from someone. Do not feel foolish for giving it wholly. You have been abandoned at times by others who did not return the Love you gave them. It was not in vain. For by giving love your love increases. There is no end to it. My Love for you is pure and cannot be corrupted. It comes straight from the heart of the Divine.
The same power that created the universe is the same power within the deepest place in your heart, an eternal wellspring of Love. Dip into the abundance of the love I have for you and drink.
Love, _______________________